I have a question for you, readers. The question is this: what is it exactly that makes for a good comic book cover? It’s a question I’ve been asking myself constantly for, oh, about three years now. It’s an obsession, I tell you! But know ye this: according to the experts, the difference between someone being merely very smart and being a genius is about 10,000 hours of  time spent obsessing over a particular task. Now, I don’t throw around words like genius lightly… BUT… I will say that I’ve spent no less than 3,000,000 hours considering the makings of a good cover. Don’t bother doing the math to see how many days that is; it’s a lot. But I have come to the following conclusion: all you need for a good cover is either A) a Nazi, or B) a zombie.

NAZI ZOMBIES #1

Cover by Ben Dunn, Joe Wight

Whaaaaa? Didn’t I just say that all you need for a good cover is either A) a Nazi, or B) a zombie?? What if you have both? Do they cancel each other out like sound waves? Or do they amplify each other like… sound waves? I don’t know. I’m not 100% sure about the mechanics of combining Nazis and zombies, but I do know this: Nazis in a comic book means guaranteed fun for the whole family, same goes for zombies. But with Nazi Zombies… OH MAMA! Let the fun begin!

It is a little sad, though. A few of you out there I know feel so strongly about both Nazis and zombies that you wanted them included in this year’s Cosmic Madness tournament to see who the best villain of all time is. But sadly they were both disqualified for not having their origins in comics and for only being a kind of general concept as opposed to an actual character. Don’t you worry, though: they’ll have their day in the sun sometime soon. Maybe next year Cosmic Madness will determine the best Vague Grouping of Bad Guys. I think vampires and shape-shifting aliens could give Nazis a run for their money.

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